Let’s agree on one thing: the current political cluster in Ukraine isn’t just some polite diplomatic deadlock that’ll unravel over Swiss cheese platters and lukewarm mineral water in Geneva. It’s a geopolitical cage match—and Vladimir Putin isn’t playing by the rules. He’s a cold-eyed ex-KGB SOB who’d sell his own grandmother for leverage. So if Donald J. Trump wants to end this standoff and come off looking like the Emperor of Peace while MAGA-nuking the legacy of every limp-wristed State Department lifer, he better start thinking like a negotiator, not a politician.
Negotiation Is War—Fight Like It.
First off, Trump needs to pound this mantra into his orange scalp:
“Never Split the Difference.”
Chris Voss, former FBI hostage negotiator and the author of that brutal manual on psychological warfare, doesn’t mince words.
Negotiating with Putin like he’s a moody CEO from Staten Island won’t cut it. This guy poisons his enemies with radioactive sushi and invades countries like he’s playing Risk drunk on vodka and resentment.
Tactical Empathy: Not butt-kissing. Understand what drives Vlad—respect, fear, and the preservation of his own power. You don’t make peace with Putin by hugging him or flattery—you make him believe the alternative is catastrophic for him, not you, and it’s time to bring out the heavy machinery.
Make him talk. Repeat his words. Box him into his own logic like a velvet-wrapped bear trap. “It seems like you’re concerned NATO is on your doorstep…” Lay it on thick. Make the tyrant feel heard. Then gut him with a well-timed “no.”
Calibrated Questions: “How does continued war benefit the Russian economy?” or “What’s your plan when your generals are six feet under and your currency is toilet paper?” These aren’t questions—they’re verbal IEDs.
The Godfather Gambit: Make Him an Offer He Can’t Refuse
Here’s the play: Trump needs to stop trying to “win” and instead engineer a lose-lose that makes peace the least painful exit for both sides.
Economic Throttle: Threaten to greenlight oil and gas warfare. Bring American energy dominance into full beast mode. Flood the global market, tank Russian oil prices, and make Putin’s Ruble look like the Mexican peso in the 80s.
Armed Leverage: Quietly arm the Ukrainian resistance like Reagan did with the Mujahideen—except this time, don’t train the future Taliban. Keep it tight, deadly, and deniable.
Public Theater + Backroom Threats: Onstage, Trump can peacock about peace. Behind the scenes? Let Putin know that the JSOC’s wet work department has a fresh budget and has mapped out his pattern of life for termination.
Force a Face-Saving Out: Offer Crimea as a “win” on paper. Let him keep it like a dog with a bone, but draw a line in Ukrainian blood on the rest. Declare neutrality for Ukraine, but slip them so many Stingers and Javelins they could blow up the next tank parade in Red Square.
This Ain’t About Morality. It’s a Street Fight in a Suit. Trump doesn’t have to play the game better than Putin—he has to change the game entirely. Bring chaos. Bring unpredictability. Say something so nuts on Fox News that it makes Putin wonder if Trump’s about to send SEAL Team 6 or Delta Force into his powder room. Make peace the sanest option.
You want to end the war? Don’t send New York developers-turned-diplomats. Send sharks in suits who smile while twisting the knife.
Trump’s base will love it. Independents will respect it. And the left? They’ll be too busy crying into their gluten-free turmeric lattes even to understand what just happened.
Just make sure you don’t split the difference.